Quirky Subtitles

The other day, I was watching Superbad for about the third time…mostly to kill time…and I couldn’t help but notice the amazingly ridiculous subtitles. I wrote some down for your viewing pleasure:

Words Spoken: That’s cool?
English Subtitles: Telephone contact good.

Words Spoken: Should I just get a shitload of different shit? [shit = booze]
English Subtitles: Prepare the man’s thing.

Words Spoken: Jules and her stupid fucking friend came up to me and they asked me to buy her alcohol.
English Subtitles: The Kai silk still has her with me. The friend goes out in the evening…know the sexy pole of her friend.

Words Spoken: …by some divine miracle, we were paired up and she actually thought of me.
English Subtitles: Then you seduce Kai silk me to seduce her friend.

Words Spoken: Now we’re never gonna bone because of that used tampon Fogel! [Fogel = the ridiculous nerdy sidekick friend]
English Subtitles: Your whole body hair is very hot…you might as well touch me.

Words Spoken: Ow! What the shit was that?!
English Subtitles: Damn, what is the row.

Words Spoken: What the fuck?!
English Subtitles: The mama of.


Also, Sir Zee has brought an amazing blog about wacky Asian pizzas to my attention (like the Shrimp Nude Pizza with Cream Cheese Mousse-Filled Crust from Mr. Pizza in Korea…holy moly) and you should check it out, too.


Peace! And Happy New Year!

-Em

"My rims keep shining..."

Nothing special to talk about today just a couple of random things:

1) The peasants in China have the weirdest fashion sense I've ever seen. Their clothing differs so much from your typical Suzhou or Shanghai resident that they can be picked out by even the least experienced waiguoren. It's like they're wearing a uniform. The first article of peasant clothing seems to be the sports coat. Whether you're male or female, you must wear a sports coat or leisure suit (I think bonus points are awarded for ridiculous colors, sateen, velour, or tweed - the louder, the better). Next, you must carry with you an enormous bag filled with your belongings at ALL times. If you can't fit inside said bag, then you're just a poser peasant. Again, extra points are awarded if your entire bag is made out of denim. Awesome. Lastly, if you are male and over the age of 35, then black leather baseball hats are the coolest thing you can possibly own. At least you think so...

2) I recently purchased and watched the Google Boys Biography. It was a very simplistic overview of the lives of Larry Page and Sergei Brin (who met in grad school) and the development of Google. Despite its simple format, I still learned a lot about what made/makes Google different from other search engines. It gives me an appreciation for the power of one good idea and it got all my entrepreneur juices flowing...

3) I've started jumping rope as part of my daily routine. Now, I'm enjoying the jumping rope, but part of me feels like I'm wasting some time while doing it. My body is active, but my mind is blank. I'm a little obsessed with efficiency and particularly the possibility of multi-tasking as much as possible in my own life. So, today I grabbed a bunch of audiobooks off the web and tried listening while I jumped. I tried Harry Potter for a little while, but I couldn't crank the volume up loud enough (it has to be pretty deafening to be clearly heard over the jumping up and down on the wooden floors) . So I pushed in Sun Tzu's "Art of War" and it worked like a charm. Pat on the back for me :)

Here is a comic that always makes me laugh:

- Jon

Holidays in Suzhou

Celebrating Hanukkah and Christmas in China is a little bizarre. There are some signs of the approaching holidays, but they are almost exclusively in up-scale malls that cater to wealthy ex-pats. Also, when I say "signs of the approaching holidays" what I really mean is these REALLY creepy anorexic-looking Santa robots that do jigs (only from the waist down) to haunting Chinese Christmas remixes. Weird, weird, weird. In any case, what I'm trying to say is that celebrating the holidays here is different...

Let me tell you a little bit more about our holiday celebrations. First off, the government has mandated that every foreigner must be given a paid vacation day on Christmas (count one for the Chinese government). [ Side note: maybe we should give the Chinese government another point for stepping in with some serious regulation of their financial system http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/26/business/worldbusiness/26exam.html?th&emc=th ] So, to make a long story short, all of the students were in school on Thursday, but all the foreigner teachers were off galavanting (what a sweet word) around town. Emma and I woke up Thursday morning around 11:30am. This mighthave been a record for both of us - as working teachers, we're pretty early risers regardless of late-night festivities. We woke up refreshed and started the morning watching a little Scrubs in bed. Then after lunch we ventured out to the local industrial worker's complex where I got my hair cut (the highlight of my haircut was probably the 15 minute shampooing by some girl who basically held me hostage in order to practice her English). Good haircut though - I was freshly shorn and felt like a million RMB! We headed downtown to this swanky shopping plaza to redeem Emma's 1000 RMB gift certificate. We spent some time picking out delicious (but absurdly expensive) chocolates and other treats, but we really hit the jackpot when we discovered a grocery store in the basement. We hauled off something like 800 RMB worth of the most delicious treats we could find. It was like one of those crazy shopping sprees that people win on game shows :)

Oh, we also spent the evening doing some holiday arts and crafts. Here is a picture of our "tree":


Happy Holidays!

- Jon
P.S. For all those who doubted me, here is a picture to prove that I did attend the Swan Lake ballet.

Christmas Eve Eve

Today is Christmas Eve Eve…December 23rd. Along the way on this road leading ultimately (if only temporarily) to Christmas, I might have exuded a little… Grinch-ness. I wasn't really into the idea of Christmas, and I think that I got bogged down with elementary school teacher pressure to have the most exuberant attitude and the liveliest party and the most flamboyant decorations and the most numerous random Christmas activities (word searches, coloring pages, etc) to top all the rest. I wanted none of it so I retreated…but somewhere along this rocky road it opened up to a beautiful view, and then the road was smoother.

I got more energetic and enthusiastic about getting presents for those I love, about making home-made x-mas cards for friends and family (even though it took a stupid long time), about making a make-shift 2-dimensional yellow x-mas tree (to-be-posted when it's complete with accompanying 2-D ornaments), about relaxing, and about spending time with and appreciating those close to me. So I must admit, I'm excited for Christmas. ☺

Also, it'll be a little late (or rather, in the midst), but Jon and I are going to also make a 3-D menorah so that our heritages are deservedly represented in our home decorations. My mom would be so proud!

Here's to wishing you all the warmth and love in the world… Happy Holidays!

Over and out,
Em

More Laughs

I lifted this from Darcy's gchat status message recently and it made me laugh pretty hard. Enjoy a little Christmas fun! (If the whole picture doesn't fit on your screen, then just left-click on the picture to load the full version.)


In other news, the NY Times is back up and running in China. This is a great relief to me :) I don't really know why China blocked access (I assume it was related to negative media coverage) and I don't know why it has been restored, so I'm just going to give my Dad credit for getting access back since he called NYT to find out what the deal was (and I'm sure he offered up his two cents...) Thanks Dad!

- Jon

Indoor Heating in a Joke

It's FREEZING here now. Last night, the temperature must have dropped 20 degrees. I could see my breath in my room in the morning! Most of you are probably thinking "Well, just crank up the heat - problem solved." At this point, it is important to realize that I basically have a glorified hair drier for a heater. Each room is equipped with an A/C unit that will pump out small amounts of heat if set on high temperatures. Brrrrrrrrr. Anyways, enough of that. Here is something that came in my Joke of the Day email that made me laugh:

Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers.

(P = the problem logged by the pilot.)
(S = the solution and action taken by the engineers.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.

S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.

S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.

S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.

S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.

S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.

S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.

S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.

S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.

S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.

S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.

S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding

on something with a hammer.

S: Took hammer away from midget

- Jon

P.S. Thanks to all of you who have been emailing me NY Times articles. Firewall be damned!

The Great Firewall Breaks Me

China censors information on the web. They make it difficult to access any sort of information on Tibet, government errors, Falun Gong, etc... This hasn't been too big an issue for me so far. I've been able to go about almost all of my online business pretty much as I would in the States. The most annoying thing was the painfully slow speed that Facebook runs at here. Facebook actually runs so slowly that it isn't really even worth using over here (which may not be a bad thing). Anyways, everything was all fine and dandy until three days ago when I noticed that NYTimes.com was blocked! This is not ok! I really enjoyed reading the news in my email and now its impossible. I'm trying to find a work-around using proxy servers, but nothing seems to be cooperating. I'm stuck in a news-less void :(

- Jon

Poetry?

Right now I'm reading "To Engineer is Human: The Role of Failure in Successful Design". The book is relatively dry, but very well-written and enjoyable. I recently came across a poem in the book that I really liked (Disclaimer: I'm usually not a huge fan of poetry. Some of it I find tedious, some of it goes right of my head, but there are some poems that I really enjoy, like this one...)

The Deacon's Masterpiece by Oliver Wendell Holmes

Have you heard of the wonderful one-hoss shay,
That was built in such a logical way
It ran a hundred years to a day,
And then, of a sudden, it — ah, but stay,
I’ll tell you what happened without delay,
Scaring the parson into fits,
Frightening people out of their wits, —
Have you ever heard of that, I say?

Seventeen hundred and fifty-five.
Georgius Secundus was then alive, —
Snuffy old drone from the German hive.
That was the year when Lisbon-town
Saw the earth open and gulp her down,
And Braddock’s army was done so brown,
Left without a scalp to its crown.
It was on the terrible Earthquake-day
That the Deacon finished the one-hoss shay.

Now in building of chaises, I tell you what,
There is always somewhere a weakest spot, —
In hub, tire, felloe, in spring or thill,
In panel, or crossbar, or floor, or sill,
In screw, bolt, thoroughbrace, — lurking still,
Find it somewhere you must and will, —
Above or below, or within or without, —
And that’s the reason, beyond a doubt,
A chaise breaks down, but doesn’t wear out.

But the Deacon swore (as Deacons do,
With an “I dew vum,” or an “I tell yeou”)
He would build one shay to beat the taown
’N’ the keounty ’n’ all the kentry raoun’;
It should be so built that it couldn’ break daown:
“Fur,” said the Deacon, “’tis mighty plain
Thut the weakes’ place mus’ stan’ the strain;
’N’ the way t’ fix it, uz I maintain,
Is only jest
T’ make that place uz strong uz the rest.”

So the Deacon inquired of the village folk
Where he could find the strongest oak,
That couldn’t be split nor bent nor broke, —
That was for spokes and floor and sills;
He sent for lancewood to make the thills;
The crossbars were ash, from the straightest trees,
The panels of white-wood, that cuts like cheese,
But lasts like iron for things like these;
The hubs of logs from the “Settler’s ellum,” —
Last of its timber, — they couldn’t sell ’em,
Never an axe had seen their chips,
And the wedges flew from between their lips,
Their blunt ends frizzled like celery-tips;
Step and prop-iron, bolt and screw,
Spring, tire, axle, and linchpin too,
Steel of the finest, bright and blue;
Thoroughbrace bison-skin, thick and wide;
Boot, top, dasher, from tough old hide
Found in the pit when the tanner died.
That was the way he “put her through.”
“There!” said the Deacon, “naow she’ll dew!”

Do! I tell you, I rather guess
She was a wonder, and nothing less!
Colts grew horses, beards turned gray,
Deacon and deaconess dropped away,
Children and grandchildren — where were they?
But there stood the stout old one-hoss shay
As fresh as on Lisbon-earthquake-day!

EIGHTEEN HUNDRED; — it came and found
The Deacon’s masterpiece strong and sound.
Eighteen hundred increased by ten; —
“Hahnsum kerridge” they called it then.
Eighteen hundred and twenty came; —
Running as usual; much the same.
Thirty and forty at last arrive,
And then come fifty, and FIFTY-FIVE.

Little of all we value here
Wakes on the morn of its hundreth year
Without both feeling and looking queer.
In fact, there’s nothing that keeps its youth,
So far as I know, but a tree and truth.
(This is a moral that runs at large;
Take it. — You’re welcome. — No extra charge.)

FIRST OF NOVEMBER, — the Earthquake-day, —
There are traces of age in the one-hoss shay,
A general flavor of mild decay,
But nothing local, as one may say.
There couldn’t be, — for the Deacon’s art
Had made it so like in every part
That there wasn’t a chance for one to start.
For the wheels were just as strong as the thills,
And the floor was just as strong as the sills,
And the panels just as strong as the floor,
And the whipple-tree neither less nor more,
And the back crossbar as strong as the fore,
And spring and axle and hub encore.
And yet, as a whole, it is past a doubt
In another hour it will be worn out!

First of November, ’Fifty-five!
This morning the parson takes a drive.
Now, small boys, get out of the way!
Here comes the wonderful one-hoss shay,
Drawn by a rat-tailed, ewe-necked bay.
“Huddup!” said the parson. — Off went they.
The parson was working his Sunday’s text, —
Had got to fifthly, and stopped perplexed
At what the — Moses — was coming next.
All at once the horse stood still,
Close by the meet’n’-house on the hill.
First a shiver, and then a thrill,
Then something decidedly like a spill, —
And the parson was sitting upon a rock,
At half past nine by the meet’n-house clock, —
Just the hour of the Earthquake shock!
What do you think the parson found,
When he got up and stared around?
The poor old chaise in a heap or mound,
As if it had been to the mill and ground!
You see, of course, if you’re not a dunce,
How it went to pieces all at once, —
All at once, and nothing first, —
Just as bubbles do when they burst.

End of the wonderful one-hoss shay.
Logic is logic. That’s all I say.

Love it!

- Jon

Traffic in China

Traffic in Shanghai (or Suzhou for that matter) can get intense at times. Sometimes cars will be almost completely gridlocked. I have a theory though that this gridlock isn't a result of the sheer number of vehicles on the road, instead it is a result of the "Chinese left turn". I've tried to explain this to a couple people, but words just don't seem to do the trick. So here is a diagram (which, unfortunately, I cannot take credit for creating) that explains the Chinese traffic patterns:

STEP 1:

We see here a typical intersection. The light has just turned green for the east-west streets, and car [A], an enormous black Lexus with pitch black windows, wants to make a left turn into the southbound lanes. Pedestrians wait on each corner. (For purposes of this demonstration, we'll assume no one is running the north-south red light, and no one is jaywalking - a rather large assumption.)

STEP 2:

To make a left turn, it is VITAL that [A] cut off all eastbound traffic as soon as possible. The first few brave or foolish legitimate pedestrians step off the curb; this is of no concern. [A] makes his move.

STEP 3:

NO! Too slow! [A] has managed to partially block [B], a brand new purple and yellow Hyundai taxi, but [A] has only achieved what Beijing drivers would consider a 'weak' blocking position.

STEP 4:

In this detail, we can see why: [A] has only inserted his left bumper and cannot move forward without contact. [B], on the other hand, is in the dominant position - by putting his wheel hard to the right and flooring it, he can fully block [A].

STEP 5:

[B] proceeds to swerve right, cutting off [C], a tiny red Peugeot with a gold plastic dragon hood ornament, spoiler and assorted knobs glued on. Since [B] is just accelerating, and [C] is now decelerating, this has created a low-density 'dead space' in the intersection. [D], a strange blue tricycle dumptruck carrying what appear to be 40 of the world's oldest propane tanks, sees this and makes a move.

STEP 6:

DENIED! [E], an old red taxi with its name sloppily stenciled in white on its doors, has boldly cut across two lanes of traffic, behind [D], and then swerved right, driving [D] into an extremely weak position behind [A]. Meanwhile, [B] and [C] are still fighting for position, with [C] muscling his way into the crosswalk. The only thing between [E] and a successful left turn is a few lawful pedestrians. [E] steps on the gas...

STEP 7:

...and is cut off by [F], an elderly man pedaling his tricycle verrrryyy slooooowwwly with a 15-foot-diameter sphere of empty plastic cooking oil bottles bungee-corded haphazardly to the cargo area. He was part of the lawful pedestrians, but seeing the stalled traffic, decided to cut diagonally across the intersection. Not only has [F] blocked [E], he is headed straight at [B], giving [C] the edge he needs.

STEP 8:

[B] concedes to [C], who drives in the crosswalk behind [F] and blocks [E]. Meanwhile, [G], a herd of about 20 bicycles, mopeds, pedestrians and wheelbarrows, sensing weakness in the eastbound lane and seeing that much of the westbound traffic is blocked behind [D], breaks north against the light. [F] pedals doggedly onward at about 2 miles per hour, his face like chiseled marble.

STEP 9:

Now things get interesting. [C] has broken free and, as the first vehicle to get where he was going, wins. [E] makes a move to block [B] but, like [A] at the start of the left turn, only gains a 'weak' block. [A] has cleverly let [F] pass and guns into a crowd of [G], which both moves [A] forward and drives some [G] stragglers into the path of [D], clearing [A]'s flanks. Little now stands between [A] and a strong second-place finish.

STEP 10:

Except for public bus [H], one of those double buses with the accordion-thing connector. [H] has been screaming unnoticed along the eastbound sidewalk and now careens dangerously into a U-turn. This doesn't appear to concern the 112 people packed inside and pressed against the windows (although that could be due to a lack of oxygen.) [H] completely blocks both [A] and [D]. On the other side of the intersection, [B] has swerved into the lawful pedestrians (who aren't important enough to warrant a letter) and has gained position on [E].

[E] has forgotten the face of his father: He was so focused on his battle with [B] that he lost sight of the ultimate goal and is now hopelessly out of position.

This clears the path for dark horse [I], a blue Buick Lacrosse, to cut all the way across behind [H] and become the second vehicle to get where he was going (and the first to complete a left turn), since [F] has changed his mind again and is now gradually drifting north into the southbound lanes. But everyone better hurry, because the light is about to change...

STEP 11:


STEP 12:

And we're ready to start over.

Amazing!

- Jon

Case of the Missing Wallet

Yesterday evening, Jon and I hung out with Robin for his last evening in Shanghai before heading back home to the US of A. We had a great time sumo wrestling with his rambunctious 9-year-old cousin, eating delicious food, drinking yummy wine, and relaxing. We were having so much fun that we ended up leaving on the late side to make our train back to Suzhou….we had to seriously book it. We sprinted through the streets, through the subway, to the train station. When we got there (with 4 minutes to spare), I was completely out of breath, my throat burned, and I was all in all exhausted. I passed out easily.

After an easy cab ride, we finally made it back to our dorm. As I unpacked, I started to panic…where was my wallet?!?! I checked, double-checked, triple-checked – nowhere to be found. Did it fall out of my jacket? Did someone take it from my pocket? I was freaking out, and quite angry with myself for losing my wallet. At least there was no money in it (good thing I’m poor, right?).

I immediately called the credit card companies to cancel everything and get new everything sent to my NY home. I still had to get a new license, and cancel my Chinese bank account, but that would have to wait until the next day.

Then this morning, I was in my coordinator’s office planning to meet later on to cancel the Chinese bank card, when she got a call…the most fortuitous call ever! Apparently, my wallet had fallen out of my jacket in the cab, and the kindest man in the world remembered us and where he had taken us, and returned it to the school (everything intact). Hallelujah!

He left his number, so I contacted him and, with scripted phrases, I thanked him for being completely awesome.

Hooray for Chinese taxi drivers!!!

Over and out,

Em

Coach Carter

Last night, we watched "Coach Carter" with Samuel L. Jackson. At first, I wasn't too thrilled about the idea of watching this movie. I even started it halfway (Jon had already watched the first half) because I didn't think I'd miss anything too important. Well, I was much more touched by the characters than I would have thought. Maybe I'm a sucker for this stuff (like Coach Carter's mentality and dedication to helping kids even when the system doesn't believe in them and they don't believe in themselves), but it was still good. Here's a quote that one of the kids on the basketball team who, at first, was antagonistic towards Coach and then found him to be a guiding light in a time of need (it's originally by Maryanne Williamson):

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our dark that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people don't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Pretty moving...and deeply inspiring.

Over and out,
Em

Christmas ala China

Christmas in China is an interesting phenomenon. The only evidence of merry-ness festivities is centered around foreigners. In Shanghai, there are a bunch of fancy schmancy western stores, like Prada, Escada, Zara, Louis Vuitton (sp?)..., that have tons of lights and fake xmas trees and giant signs with oh-so-jolly Santa Clauses and "Merry Christmas" outside. It feels really bizarre, like the only way to celebrate xmas is through super expensive shopping...in a removed westerner way. Not that I'm into the religious aspects (AT ALL), but I'd rather focus on family, friends, and spending warm quality time with one another. It's a little hard to do in this atmosphere. But I'm doing my best. I an giving in to the gift-giving aspect this year, which I'm normally not that good at (I'm more of a spontaneous giver), but I figure I can give my "tourist" gifts as xmas gifts (2 for 1, baby).

Mostly, the part of xmas that has been occupying the most time for me is the xmas performance that my class is doing with the rest of the International Department at my school this coming Friday. I wrote a short play called "A Marshmallow Season" about a girl who really wants it to snow, who feels that the air is so magical this year that it will snow, about classmates' doubt of snow coming (since it rarely snows here in Suzhou), and about the snow that does ultimately come, bringing joy to all (holy corniness). Then they sing Let it Snow, singing along with music....and then 4 students have piano, saxophone, and flute solos, which is pretty cool. I thought it was going to just be awesome all around. But painful and difficult organization and planning has gone into these shananigans. I always seem to do that...make more work for myself. Right now, I can't wait for it to be over!!! I usually shy away from the cheesy xmas festivities and Santa coloring pages and mundane activities centered around a religious holiday masquerading as a Hallmark profiting scheme....eh, the two excuses get intertwined in a whirlwind. But here I had no choice. Well, I guess in reality, I like a little bit of xmas cheer, and I'm excited to see my students perform...I think they're gonna be great. And then afterwards, I can really kick my feet up and relax. Mmmmm....

In other randomness, I've been feeling sick after almost every Chinese meal that I have. Not hurling bad, but gripping-my-stomach bad. I think it might be the pans that they use....or the unclean ingredients. Either would do it. I hope it gets better....but for now, I'll make most of my own food, thank you very much.

Later friends!

C.R.E.A.M.

For those who have not been to the 36 Chambers, C.R.E.A.M. is a Wu-Tang Clan song and an acronym that stands for Cash Rules Everything Around Me. It also reminds me of one of my favorite frisbee cheers (thanks Luke!) Anyways, it's late here in Suzhou and I'm exhausted from my weekend in Shanghai, but I wanted to make a quick note of a recent discovery of mine. A good friend in Suzhou told me that money could be made on blogs by displaying a small google ad on the side. At first, I was skeptical, but I figured that any shot at earning money without doing any work was worth a shot, so I signed up for AdSense and am now displaying a google ad (which you can see on the right side of your screen) on my page. I've been trying to convince friends to click on the link whenever they visit the site and so far their clicks (16) have generated $5.33. Pretty cool! I'm planning on using on pay for all my vegetables using only earnings from my AdSense account :) Haha. Free money is awesome. Please keep clicking!

I anticipate that some of you might have some questions about payment details. Unfortunately, Google is painfully vague about how much each click is worth. From what I can gather, different ad words cost different amounts (the more unique, the more expensive). As a consequence, each click on a "more unique" ad will generate more money for my account. So far, it looks like I am averaging around 30 or 35 cents per click. I like to think of that as 1 lb of tangerines per click. Yum!

- Jon

"Old Godzilla was hopping around Tokyo city like a big playground..."

NOTE: FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T USUALLY READ THE BLOG

IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THE SONG FROM THE TITLE IT IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN OF ULTIMATE DESTINY:



Yesterday I had one of those moments where you just stop and think to yourself "What the hell am I doing here?" (But, in a good way.) I was playing basketball with a handful of security guards from the school and we were doing our best to communicate in broken Chinese and English. I was trying to explain that I was going back to my apartment to cook pasta. They couldn't understand why I would ever want to eat so late (this was at 7:15pm). It's very weird to live in a foreign country, surrounded by people who speak a different language and have a profoundly different way of acting (and seeing the world around them). It's wonderful though. It forces one to appreciate the multi-facetedness of everything around us. There is never one way to look at something. Interpretation matters just as much as the actions/events themselves and we all have our own unique ways of interpreting 0ur environment. I'm rambling on a bit more than I had intended...

I was thinking today about why I am here in China. As many of you know, I have delayed moving to Colorado and deferred my enrollment in my Statistics PhD program for one year to come to China. I came to China with three main goals: 1) explore a new country 2) learn Chinese 3) relax and enjoy myself. So far, I think I'm making pretty good progress all 3 fronts (particularly #3), but next semester I'd really like kick things up a notch in the Chinese studying department. I am going to begin formal instruction at a university. I'm looking at a semester-long, intensive study program with 20 hours of instruction a week. I'm psyched!

我很喜欢打蓝球！

再见！
Jon
P.S. I will continue experimenting more and more with typing in Chinese!

Shanghaied

We had our first visit to Qi Pu Lu (also endearingly called Cheap Street) in Shanghai this past weekend. The street is basically a one-stop shopping extravaganza. It's a bargain hunters dream. There are thousands of little stalls selling everything from freaky wigs to hip-hop sweatshirts and nothing has a listed price (so bring your bargaining skills). The place was teeming with people on Saturday and that only added to the experience. Here are a couple of pictures from our time in Qi Pu:

This is what I would look like if I went platinum and did a lot of drugs.

Wig store.

Grabbing some post-shopping food with the gang!

Happy couple :)

Despite my non-consumer tendencies, I ended up purchasing two items. A new Chinese flannel and a fake Nuggets basketball jersey.

- Jon
P.S. In other news, Hugh taught me how to text in Chinese on my phone. Pretty exciting!

Sugar in Your Gas Tank

It's been a long time since I mentioned anything about my classes. Things have been going really well at school for me. I've been enjoying my classes for the most part. I think I'm connecting with the kids despite the language/age barriers and I'm teaching some interesting material (at least in high school). I don't write much about teaching on the blog because I prefer to keep my work life separate from the rest of my life. I try not to think about work after around 5 or 6pm. This is particularly important for me while I'm teaching because there is ALWAYS more to do to become a better teacher.

This past week my PGA3 (high school seniors) class finished up the material for our math and science classes two weeks ahead of schedule! This is really a testament to the dedication and diligence of my students. I decided that we should have a party to celebrate their hard work... So yesterday, instead of evening class, I met my kids in the music room for their party. Now, I was planning on just going along as an adult chaperone (kind of like chaperoning a middle school dance), but the class had other plans. They did their best to include me in all of the goofy activities that they had planned. The whole party was really bizarre. It started off with a KFC feast (Chinese people LOOOOOOOOOOVE KFC) and then was followed by an acapella performance of some Britney Spears song by one of the students (which was awesome). After a bit more singing and drumming they started playing a game similar to hot potato. If you were the one holding the hot potato you had to perform a "show" of your choice. Basically, this game is all about watching your friends make fools out of themselves. Now, the kids rigged the game repeatedly and forced me to perform shows for them. I'm not much of a singer and I couldn't really think of anything, so I ended up teaching them how to line dance. Hilarious... I really wish I had a video of it. There was a lot more singing and goofy games. It was really fun and I think the kids enjoyed it!

In other news, I have been getting a Joke-a-Day email. Most of the jokes are terrible, but I recently got one that was sort of clever. Hope you enjoy it:

A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a ‘funeral director.’ After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a funeral director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse carriers. With a smile on her face she explained, ‘I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.’

- Jon

“This place is like Dr. Seuss’s worst nightmare."

This weekend a small group of frisbee players got together to celebrate our Team Blue fall league victory. The fall league victory wasn't really a big deal at all - we just wanted a good excuse to hang out together after frisbee was over... We all met up at Erich's (a Swedish professional disc golfer) house, chatted, drank some beers, and admired his apartment. He had an impressive bachelor pad laid out. Simple and elegant design, huge bed, jacuzzi in the bathroom, and a refridgerator filled with drinks and not a piece of food in sight. At some point, Geoff got a text from one of his friends who works at a club and was offering us each 5 free drinks. Now, I'd hang out just about anywhere if there were free drinks involved in the deal, so I was happy to pile into a cab and head over to JJ2 Lounge (or something like that). We picked up a couple of more friends here and walked into the club and it was like entering an alternate universe. I've never been in a club like this before. There was smoke swirling around the whole place, bizarre spotlights flashing all over the place, music blasting, a scantily clad dread-locked singer dancing around (and being drooled on by about 10 guys). JJ2 lounge defies description - words really can't do this place justice. The best description I could muster when I entered was turning to Robin and saying "This place looks like space." Not my best work, but funny nonetheless.

- Jon

Thanksgiving in a Strange Land

China is definitely a strange land, but that's not really the focus of this post. I just want to write a quick blurb about Thanksgiving here. Thanksgiving (being an American holiday) is not celebrated here at all, but a group of American teachers at my school decided to get together and give it our best shot. We all got gathered at Keli and Amanda's for a delicious pot-luck dinner. Everybody brought bizarrely different (but still wonderful dishes) - Emma made zucchini, Ryan made fruit salad and bought some chickens, Sebastian brought some Chilean bruschetta type stuff, Pilar contributed an amazing cake, Mike made macaroni and cheese, and I made 2 lbs of pasta (those of you who know me well would have expected nothing else). I really like potluck dinners. There's something special about cooking/baking your own food and then bringing it to share with others. That's what Thanksgiving is all about to me - bonding over food :) It's not the same as turkey dinner at home with family, but these funky Thanksgivings abroad are just as special.

- Jon

Mario's Pizza

My mom and dad arrived in Italy on Thursday for a little vacation (I must admit, I was kind of jealous…probably because I miss them). That same evening, Jon and I went with one of my students and her mom and little brother to this restaurant called Mario's Pizza. It's kind of far away from us: a 25 min car ride (and about a 2 hour bus ride....we took their car….sweet!). My student's dad is part owner of the restaurant...not Italian though. The evening was a big deal to me because Mario's pizza is pretty famous: it’s written up in LonelyPlanet and a few friends had mentioned a while back that they wanted to check it out….even before knowing that my student was involved in any way.


Anyway, I've really wanted to go there, and the food was surprisingly really good…and not just for a Chinese Italian restaurant! I got the seafood pizza.....mmmm! Delicious! One of my favorites. And my student’s mom got red wine, that she barely had a glass of so Jon and I shared the bottle... Yup…just what you’re thinking…

We had a caprese salad (with surprisingly AMAZING oregano), and some bread (eh, on that one) with olive oil. AND chocolate pizza, which was essentially a quesadilla with nutella inside...i.e., super awesome scrumptiousness. All in all, it was a sweet evening (and a treated dinner) – my belly and heart were very happy (a little taste of Italy and home).

Chocolate pizza. Buonissima!

Over and out,
Em

"Boots with the fur..."

Many of you will recognize the lyrics from this post's title. Sadly, the title has nothing at all to do with the content - the song has just been stuck in my head recently (mostly because of Sarah singing it incessantly at frisbee). On the upside, the song still brings back pleasant memories of Smartwhores in Brooklyn. Also, I still can't get over the fact the name Flo-rida. So impressed. Haha.

Anyways, this week has passed by relatively quickly and not too much out of the ordinary happened. We had a going away party for Angela (one of my colleagues at school who has quit and is moving back to Germany this Sunday). The highlight of the party was definitely watching the straight confusion on the faces of our Chinese friends as we tried to explain Texas Hold 'Em and Mafia. Their faces just screamed "help me!" It made for some pretty entertaining (if slow moving) games. On Thursday Emma and I were treated to a delicious meal at Mario's Pizza. As a rule, we don't eat much Western food in China (it is much more expensive than Chinese food and usually doesn't taste much like the real thing), but one of Emma's student's invited us to Mario's (a restaurant owned by her father). The food was delicious, the wine was good, and we even got to play with a two year-old Chinese boy who stumbled around the restaurant. Free food always warms my heart :)

In other news, I have been thinking about Japanese game shows a lot recently. Do they have Chinese equivalents? Are they half as ridiculous? Can I get on one? In college, I considered myself a connoisseur of Japanese game shows (if you can be a connoisseur of something so stupid and ridiculous). I've been rewatching them on YouTube recently and showing them to my students - who are duly impressed by such nonsense. Here are a couple of my favorites:



Japanese tongue twisters + mechanized crotch shots = recipe for hilarity.



Human Tetris is always good for a few laughs.



Endurance. Probably my favorite of all time. I still can't believe it exists.



Here's a pretty silly one where they do stupid things in a library. You have to wait until the "Old Man Bites Tenderly" event. It's worth it.

- Jon

"When the magnolia blossoms fill the air..."

This past weekend was spent in Shanghai (like many weekends before). We went in early on Friday in an attempt to procure tickets to the Masters Cup and watch Federer dominate. Unfortunately, the scalpers outside the stadium didn't have anything in our price range :( I was a little bummed that we couldn't get tickets, but the night ended up being a blast anyways.

I feel like I'm in a different frame of mind living here in China. I am focused on taking advantage of the unique opportunities that I am presented with here (as diverse as they are). This might not sound like much of a revelation, but my whole approach is different than it was in New York. In NYC, I was constantly surrounded by a remarkable variety of exciting new things. I was able to partake in some cool activities, but I let a lot pass by... This isn't to say that I wasn't enjoying myself in NYC, but I was enjoying myself in the same way I've grown accustomed to without experimenting much. I spent most of my free time hanging out with friends in Brooklyn or playing frisbee. Good times for sure, but not different. In China, I find that I still spend a lot of time frisbee (frisbee is life, after all), but I approach new activities and excursions with a much more enthusiastic outlook. I'm going to Kanye West concerts, new restaurants, sweet mountains, international hockey matches, etc... Whenever a friend approaches me with a new idea, I have a little voice in the back of my head that says "you're only going to live here once - do it!" Hmmm, I just re-read that and its not terrible articulate, but I'm too tired to go back through and re-write it. Hope you're all able to decipher the babblings...

In other news, there is a definitive lack of good BBQ ribs in China. I'm contemplating building a smoker and filling this void. I'm sure many quality blog entries will result from this escapade...

Jon

NYT and MC Hammer - What do they have in common?

I was reading a NY Times article this morning that really struck me. Here is the intro:

"There is a new common symptom of the flu, in addition to the usual aches, coughs, fevers and sore throats. Turns out a lot of ailing Americans enter phrases like “flu symptoms” into Google and other search engines before they call their doctors.

That simple act, multiplied across millions of keyboards in homes around the country, has given rise to a new early warning system for fast-spreading flu outbreaks, called Google Flu Trends.

Tests of the new Web tool from Google.org, the company’s philanthropic unit, suggest that it may be able to detect regional outbreaks of the flu a week to 10 days before they are reported by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

We already know that Google is the best at everything (that's not my point here). Google is using the internet as a predictive tool. Instead of waiting for events to occur (and data to be collected and analyzed) here Google is getting predictive data immediately. This technique cuts out the labor (at time) intensive data collection process, thereby reaching conclusions much more quickly and, in this case, slowing the spread of a flu virus via quick dissemination of information. What a powerful tool! Statisticians would sell their collective souls to the devil just to get Google's search data...

In other news, a friend in Shanghai sent me the following YouTube video that made me laugh hysterically for at least a minute. You can learn a lot about China just by watching this video (note: my favorite part is the person in the background).



- Jon

"What I liked best was she had so much soul..."

Another exciting event from last week (Monday night) was the Kanye West concert!!!! It was really bizarre to see a concert in China. They whole thing seemed a little off, but it was still a hell of a lot of fun. The first act was hilarious and silly. Imagine an Asian version of Michael Jackson in a cut-off tanktop moonwalking back and forth across the stage throwing his hands up singing. Pretty spectacular. Kanye came out and the whole crowd went nuts. Now, it should be noted that the stadium was at less than 50% capacity and the crowd was composed overwhelmingly of white foreigners. It must have been a shock to Kanye to see a half-empty stadium of white people in Shanghai, but in China you have to be prepared for anything... The concert itself was a blast! Emma, Charlotte, and I were way up in the upper deck, but we had plenty of room and the girls broke up some dance moves. The sound system was powerful and crystal clear and we grooved. It was fun!!! Here are some pictures of us at the concert and then a couple of Kanye (that a friend in the front row took for us...)

Emma, me, and Char at the concert

Our view at the concert

Kanye doing his thing...

Every time we go back to Suzhou we take the train from Shanghai Railway station to Suzhou. Then we walk about 10 minutes to the bus stop (where we pick up the bus that takes us home). Anyways, so this past week as we were walking towards our bus stop we saw this guy reaching down into a hole in the storm drain on the side of the street. He was up to his elbow in the muck and he was really going after something. I assumed he had dropped something important in the drain and was trying to dig it out. Then, as we approached, he yanked out a fish! He was fishing with his bare hands in the sewer! He wrapped up his filthy fish (which was covered in muck) in a plastic bag and went on his way. God, I hope he doesn't work at a restaurant in our part of town...

Over and out from Suzhou.

- Jon
P.S. My new song obsessions are Hey Mama and Homecoming by Kanye...

In a minute...

Remember that PBS pre-commercial bizarre 15-second bit that went, “In a minute! In a minute! In a minute! In a minute!” ?? Letting us know that we only had to wait a (relative) minute before enjoying more Big Bird, or whatever…Anyone? Well, anyway, this post will be (should be) just as flashy: a sort of drive-by updating.

Hong Kong: Some of the weekend was pretty sweet. We all rocked out at the party, winning the prize for best group performance, and we also took in all the bright colors and drunken odors at the nearby carnival ala’ Mardi Gras. However, I was a little too ambitious: I played a bit of Ultimate and I paid the price. My back went out again, not even half way through the 2nd game. Turns out I’m not invincible. Blast! I was pretty pissed at myself for making the decision to play in the first place, and at not being able to play, and at being in stupidly horrid pain. Blah. I’m going to start seeing a Pilates/Physical Therapy expert in Shanghai, so initiative is (finally) being taken.

Halloween: Remember Halloween back in elementary school, dressing up as witches and vampires, trick-or-treating, and having a day of games and candy at school?? Awesome right? Well, when the table has turned, it becomes a royal pain of a freak show to provide the shenanigans that both kids want and teachers expect. It’s like each class is in competition to see how many stupid orange pumpkins she can hang up (which has completely killed our supply of orange paper, I’ll tell you that much). At first I was a little bitter, but I ended up getting into it. We played pin the hat on the witch, musical chairs, and mummy wrap. I even dressed up…I even made part of my costume (note the ears…and the hidden tail made of sewn cloth with a hanger and paper stuffed inside).

My cat-alicious self with some of my little munchkin wizards, witches, monkeys, skeletons, and fellow felines.

The basis for "Pin the Hat/Broom End/Feet on the Witch" that I drew. What a hideous monster I've created!

Mummy Wrap: The Pumpkin girl and the Scarecrow doing a scarily good job of mummifying their classmates.

I ended up having a great time, and came away with a sackful of candy. Bonus! Plus, later that evening we all went out (minus students…) to get free beer courtesy of our sweet costumes. Oh, the benefits of being a lao wai…

Election: HOLY MOLY!!! I am so f&*#ing glad that Obama won! I mean, this doesn’t instantly solve all of America’s or the world’s problems, but it’s surely a step in the right direction. I read an article from The Onion that my brother, Paul, brought to my attention, entitled Nation Finally Shitty Enough To Make Social Progress. It makes a pretty interesting, and painfully clear, point of how we can’t seem to get out of the habit of waiting until the shit really hits the fan and we’re all covered in the gross shit that we’ve, until now, tried to dump on the world…before even thinking of switching gears. Apparently, “42 percent of voters said that the nation's financial woes had finally become frightening enough to eclipse such concerns as gay marriage, while 30 percent said that the relentless body count in Iraq was at last harrowing enough to outweigh long ideological debates over abortion.” All I have to say is, puh-leez. Some Americans have - thankfully - momentarily pulled their heads out of their asses to make what in my mind was the right vote…I just hope now that the movement toward change doesn’t sacrifice “small” causes like gay marriage and women’s reproductive rights (the passing of Prop 8, banning gay marriage in California, already sends alarming shivers through my veins).

Furthermore, as Paul cautiously points out: Of course, even though Obama "kicked ass" in the election, and the "people have spoken," the vote was still something like a 52-48% split. This country is so weird. I’m with ya. America is freakin’ weird. Hopefully Obama can rally up the nation to help us really see and believe in the potential awesomeness that America has. I love ya, bro!

Over and out.
Em

P.S. Not quite drive-by in-a-minute updating…sorry…the intent was there. ☺

Black Market Receipts

Emma and I have spent a lot of time in Shanghai's Railway station over these past few months because of our many trips to and from Shanghai. On every corner surrounding the train station there are ladies mumbling under their breath "fa piao, fa piao, fa piao, fa piao" (fa piao means receipt in Chinese). So, I knew that these ladies were interested in receipts for some reason, but I didn't really understand why. I learned that they were interested in both buying and selling fa piao, but couldn't get any further because of my lack of speaking skills. I asked my friends in Shanghai about fa piao and found out that they are the official form of receipts and businesses use them for expenses and companies use them for tax purposes. These women in the railway station buy fa piao from anybody and sell them to people who need them for expenses.

Fa piao (note the red chops, Chinese people love that stuff)

This past weekend I was in the eyeglasses market with Milan and Mary (they were shopping) and we passed a fa piao lady. I got so excited that I scared my friends... I convinced Mary (who is fluent) to pump the fa piao lady for information. They had a little conversation that involved a lot of pointing at me, some laughing, and eventually some knowledge. It turns out that a fa piao for approximately 100 RMB is worth 2 RMB. So, for every receipt that I collect I can get 2% back on the black market! I'm going to collect all the fa piao I possibly can!!!! I'll be keeping track of the amount of $$$ I make from fa piao on the blog (although I haven't decided whether I should measure it in RMB or in fractions of Teppanyaki). All in all, this is a very exciting moment for me :)

- Jon

Shanghai Hockey?

This past weekend one of our friends scored some free tickets to an international hockey match (Shanghai Sharks vs. some team from South Korea). I'm not a big fan of hockey, but this sounded like a fun, new experience, so I was pretty excited about all of it! Anyways, after frisbee, some delicious Xinjiang food, and a quick trip to the eyeglasses market (I will say more about this in a later post) we made our way down to the stadium. The stadium was out on the end of the Line 9 subway. Now, I don't have a vast knowledge of Shanghai (I don't live there after all), but I hadn't even heard of Line 9. It is a rarely used boondocky subway that took us out into the 'burbs. It was like going back to Suzhou :) We got to the rink just in time for the game to begin and it was everything that I dreamed it would be... The hockey was definitely mediocre (think high school/college level), but the atmosphere was hilarious. There were thunder sticks everywhere, dancing cheerleaders on a stage (the Chinese seem to have an unhealthy obsession with cheerleaders, but that's a topic for another post), and beer-swilling Chinese hockey fans. It was terrific!

High quality hockey

Picture time at the hockey game!

The highlight of the match for me was betting Robin a bunch of bananas that no goals would be scored in the 3rd period only to have Shanghai tie up the score with a goal in the final 19 seconds of the 3rd period. You just can't manufacture excitement like that! Haha. Anyways, once the game was over we needed to get back to Shanghai, but at this point the subway is no longer so we hire out this sketchy mini-van and ride joyfully back to Shanghai. On the ride back, we prank called Joann (a frisbee friend). We pretended to be lost in cab with a cabbie who only spoke Cantonese and asked her to talk to the cabbie for us. Joann (who speaks Cantonese fluently) then spoke with the "cab driver" Geoff (our friend in the van who also speaks Cantonese). Geoff proceeded along an inappropriate line of questioning (in Cantonese) asking Joann if she was pretty and where she lived. It was all quite amusing at the time, but definitely loses something in the the re-telling. I actually just re-read that and realized how little sense it makes, but I'm too lazy to re-type all of that and I'm just going to leave it up there as is.

Ok, back to work for me!

- Jon

Halloween Suzhou-style

Halloween isn't really done here in China. The Chinese kids know about its existence and wanted to celebrate it. I taught them "trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat" and gave myself a virtual pat on the back. Now, that's a job well done. Haha. Aside from a couple of candy-crazed kids Halloween is a foreigner-only event in China. A bunch of the other young foreign teachers at our school decided that we should take advantage of the Friday night/Halloween festivities to go out in style. We found an Aussie bar in town that was serving free beer (7pm-midnight) to anybody in costume! I couldn't believe it. FREE BEER. This is unheard of... I mean, I'd dress up like an idiot every weekend if it meant free beer. God, I love free things. Anyways, we slapped together some costumes last minute. Actually, I shouldn't say that. The girls (Emma, Keli, and Amanda) put some serious time and effort (and arts & crafts skills) into their costume and turned out with 1 pregnant redneck and 2 cats. I decided to go with the low-effort route and chose to be a Chinese tour guide. Now, this doesn't make as much sense for those of you who have never seen a Chinese tour, but I'll try to give a little description. Basically, Chinese tours consist of 30 random Chinese (who are all forced to wear matching brightly colored hats) and a tour guide. The tour guide has a similiar brightly colored hat, brightly colored flag, and finals a mobile amp for blasting whatever it is they say to anybody within a 5-mile radius. Anyways, we made our way downtown as a Chinese tour guide, 2 cats, and a pregnant redneck (and her husband) . We drank free beer, chatted, and had a wonderful time. The best part of it was actually the whole crowd of Chinese that gathered around the bar to stare at all the foreigners in costume. They enjoyed the show as much as we enjoyed the free beer. It was a win-win!

Quality Halloween in China!

- Jon
P.S. MUCH more will follow in the near future. Sorry I haven't been updating recently, but I'll get back on that...

Vegas meets China

Hong Kong is a special place. I was only there for a weekend and I spent the vast majority of that time playing frisbee, but the little I did see shocked and intrigued me. HK seemed like a city of contradictions and odd juxtapositions. Everywhere I looked there was opulence (BMWs, mansions, Louis Vuitton (sp?) stores, etc...) and there was squalor (beggars, ghettos, etc...) When we first arrived in Hong Kong I was taken aback by the bright lights and the Vegas-like atmosphere of Kowloon. The diversity of Hong Kong's streets was a shock for the system as well. I've adjusted to Suzhou (and China in general) which is an incredibly homogenous place. I'm not sure what the actual demographics are, but everybody here is Asian (no surprise, really). This is not true in Hong Kong. There were tons of people of all different races and from all different countries walking around the streets drinking, eating, and socializing. It was like NYC. Anyways, I wish I had been able to spend more time in Hong Kong, but I'm sure that I will return to explore it later...

Here are a couple pictures from the weekend:

O-line (Sherry, Nutt, Sam, me, Robin, Sara, Jono)

Joann, Robin, and our cabbie on the way back from the fields

Emma helping me prepare my costume on the subway (who knows what I'm doing...)

The tournament was a blast. We lost to a team from the Phillipines in the semis. Our team's performance varied from nearly perfect to downright sloppy. There were definitely some flashes of brilliance and I think a lot of hope for the future. The tournament party was pretty fun too :) Highlights include a lot of couch dancing (hard to describe), Double Dragon skit, and eating a HUGE pile of McD fries in the middle of the night!

- Jon

GROSS

I ate my first chicken foot last night - ugh. Imagine nibbling salty skin from around a chicken toe-nail/claw... That's pretty much exactly what it's like. I don't get why anybody would be interested in the first place - there isn't any meat on the thing to begin with... I guess I shouldn't go on about this too much because I wasn't forced to eat the foot. I was just out with a couple of the Chinese teachers that I play basketball with and I didn't want to seem rude. Bah. I'm going to tell my Mom that good manners did end up almost killing me.

We leave for Hong Kong today!

- Jon

"The only one who could ever reach me..."

I don't have anything in particular to say right now. I just have a few things going through my head that I want to get down...

1) Despite my previous short anti-political rant, Palin scares me. Check out the website http://www.palinaspresident.us/ move your mouse around and click on random objects in the room.

2) My parents are in China right now! They have spent the past week or so on a pretty sweet tour of "China's Tourist Highlights" (Great Wall, Forbidden City, Terracotta Warriors, tea plantation, etc...) It's pretty cool that they've come all this way to explore a new country. I'm glad that I could provide the impetus for such an adventure! I'm also pretty excited to take a couple of days to explore with them...

3) I am taking 4 days off over the next week. I emailed the foreign teacher liaison about this almost a month ago and he just told me that it wasn't possible for me to take leave. I emailed back trying to express how important this was to me and that I wasn't really asking for leave, more that I was informing him that I wasn't going to be around. At this point, he chose not to respond (this is a common tactic - if you hear something you don't like, just pretend you never heard it and under no circumstances should you confront the issue). Anyways, this situation lasted for a couple of weeks during which I'd send the odd email to remind him that I wasn't going to be around for 4 days. Just yesterday he decided to address the issue and tell the vice-principal about it. Now it's become a huge fiasco. More details will follow on this I'm sure as things develop...

4) I'm really excited to play in my first Asian frisbee tournament in Hong Kong. The level of frisbee out here is significantly lower than that in the States, but I'm still REALLY excited to play in a competitive tournament. I like the people on our team a lot and I'm looking forward to spending the weekend with them playing, eating, and partying in Hong Kong!

5) Huangshan was ridiculously beautiful and we haven't posted enough pictures of it...

Here I am saving the world...

All the lockets and a mountain view

Only in China...

- Jon

Vote!

As many of you know, I am not terribly interested in politics. Quite the opposite actually... I find political discussions at best boring and at worst painful and divisive. I know it doesn't have to be this way, but maybe I've just sat through too many arguments over abortion or Iraq that just consisted of people waiting for their turn to speak and never coming even close to any sort of compromise or sharing of thoughts or really listening for that matter. Anyways, I didn't start this post to rip on political discussion (my Swat friends will have my head over this in any event), but instead to say that yesterday I sent in my absentee ballot! Despite my anti-political sentiments, I love voting. It's fun! Unfortunately, I've never had the normal voting experience because I've been abroad during the last two presidential elections. Absentee ballots for me!

- Jon

Phillies Phever!

As many of you on the other side of the world already know, the Phillies have just beaten the Dodgers to win the National League pennant and will soon be playing in the World Series! This may not seem like a monumental event, but I assure you that for any Phillies fan anywhere this is a big deal. Philadelphia has been plagued by mediocre (or downright terrible) professional sports teams for the past two and half decades (i.e. my entire life). They haven't won a championship since 1983 (no Super Bowl, no World Series, no Stanley Cup, and no whatever they win in the NBA.) It's been a tough time to be a fan. Year after year Philadelphia sports teams will either perform terribly or play just well enough to almost make it. It's gotten to the point where its hard to be optimistic about anything Philly sports related.

This reminds me of the last time the Phillies were in the World Series. It was 1993 and I was 9 years old. I was an avid baseball card collector and loved playing the game. It was with great pleasure that I watched the Phillies take on the Toronto Blue Jays. In a thrilling 7-game series, the Phillies built up my hopes and dreams and then crushed them suddenly. I remember watching Joe Carter hit the walk-off home run in Game 7. It was then that my innocence as a sports fan died. I also burned all of Mitch Williams cards after that game. I still cringe when I hear his name. "Wild Thing" - please...

Anyways, I wish I were back in the States and could revel in the Phillies' glory. I wish I could watch the games on TV. I wish I could tease Rob about the Mets collapsing again. But alas, no. It is almost impossible to watch a live game out here (due to time difference and work). There is no joy in Mudville :(

- Jon