“This place is like Dr. Seuss’s worst nightmare."

This weekend a small group of frisbee players got together to celebrate our Team Blue fall league victory. The fall league victory wasn't really a big deal at all - we just wanted a good excuse to hang out together after frisbee was over... We all met up at Erich's (a Swedish professional disc golfer) house, chatted, drank some beers, and admired his apartment. He had an impressive bachelor pad laid out. Simple and elegant design, huge bed, jacuzzi in the bathroom, and a refridgerator filled with drinks and not a piece of food in sight. At some point, Geoff got a text from one of his friends who works at a club and was offering us each 5 free drinks. Now, I'd hang out just about anywhere if there were free drinks involved in the deal, so I was happy to pile into a cab and head over to JJ2 Lounge (or something like that). We picked up a couple of more friends here and walked into the club and it was like entering an alternate universe. I've never been in a club like this before. There was smoke swirling around the whole place, bizarre spotlights flashing all over the place, music blasting, a scantily clad dread-locked singer dancing around (and being drooled on by about 10 guys). JJ2 lounge defies description - words really can't do this place justice. The best description I could muster when I entered was turning to Robin and saying "This place looks like space." Not my best work, but funny nonetheless.

- Jon

Thanksgiving in a Strange Land

China is definitely a strange land, but that's not really the focus of this post. I just want to write a quick blurb about Thanksgiving here. Thanksgiving (being an American holiday) is not celebrated here at all, but a group of American teachers at my school decided to get together and give it our best shot. We all got gathered at Keli and Amanda's for a delicious pot-luck dinner. Everybody brought bizarrely different (but still wonderful dishes) - Emma made zucchini, Ryan made fruit salad and bought some chickens, Sebastian brought some Chilean bruschetta type stuff, Pilar contributed an amazing cake, Mike made macaroni and cheese, and I made 2 lbs of pasta (those of you who know me well would have expected nothing else). I really like potluck dinners. There's something special about cooking/baking your own food and then bringing it to share with others. That's what Thanksgiving is all about to me - bonding over food :) It's not the same as turkey dinner at home with family, but these funky Thanksgivings abroad are just as special.

- Jon

Mario's Pizza

My mom and dad arrived in Italy on Thursday for a little vacation (I must admit, I was kind of jealous…probably because I miss them). That same evening, Jon and I went with one of my students and her mom and little brother to this restaurant called Mario's Pizza. It's kind of far away from us: a 25 min car ride (and about a 2 hour bus ride....we took their car….sweet!). My student's dad is part owner of the restaurant...not Italian though. The evening was a big deal to me because Mario's pizza is pretty famous: it’s written up in LonelyPlanet and a few friends had mentioned a while back that they wanted to check it out….even before knowing that my student was involved in any way.


Anyway, I've really wanted to go there, and the food was surprisingly really good…and not just for a Chinese Italian restaurant! I got the seafood pizza.....mmmm! Delicious! One of my favorites. And my student’s mom got red wine, that she barely had a glass of so Jon and I shared the bottle... Yup…just what you’re thinking…

We had a caprese salad (with surprisingly AMAZING oregano), and some bread (eh, on that one) with olive oil. AND chocolate pizza, which was essentially a quesadilla with nutella inside...i.e., super awesome scrumptiousness. All in all, it was a sweet evening (and a treated dinner) – my belly and heart were very happy (a little taste of Italy and home).

Chocolate pizza. Buonissima!

Over and out,
Em

"Boots with the fur..."

Many of you will recognize the lyrics from this post's title. Sadly, the title has nothing at all to do with the content - the song has just been stuck in my head recently (mostly because of Sarah singing it incessantly at frisbee). On the upside, the song still brings back pleasant memories of Smartwhores in Brooklyn. Also, I still can't get over the fact the name Flo-rida. So impressed. Haha.

Anyways, this week has passed by relatively quickly and not too much out of the ordinary happened. We had a going away party for Angela (one of my colleagues at school who has quit and is moving back to Germany this Sunday). The highlight of the party was definitely watching the straight confusion on the faces of our Chinese friends as we tried to explain Texas Hold 'Em and Mafia. Their faces just screamed "help me!" It made for some pretty entertaining (if slow moving) games. On Thursday Emma and I were treated to a delicious meal at Mario's Pizza. As a rule, we don't eat much Western food in China (it is much more expensive than Chinese food and usually doesn't taste much like the real thing), but one of Emma's student's invited us to Mario's (a restaurant owned by her father). The food was delicious, the wine was good, and we even got to play with a two year-old Chinese boy who stumbled around the restaurant. Free food always warms my heart :)

In other news, I have been thinking about Japanese game shows a lot recently. Do they have Chinese equivalents? Are they half as ridiculous? Can I get on one? In college, I considered myself a connoisseur of Japanese game shows (if you can be a connoisseur of something so stupid and ridiculous). I've been rewatching them on YouTube recently and showing them to my students - who are duly impressed by such nonsense. Here are a couple of my favorites:



Japanese tongue twisters + mechanized crotch shots = recipe for hilarity.



Human Tetris is always good for a few laughs.



Endurance. Probably my favorite of all time. I still can't believe it exists.



Here's a pretty silly one where they do stupid things in a library. You have to wait until the "Old Man Bites Tenderly" event. It's worth it.

- Jon

"When the magnolia blossoms fill the air..."

This past weekend was spent in Shanghai (like many weekends before). We went in early on Friday in an attempt to procure tickets to the Masters Cup and watch Federer dominate. Unfortunately, the scalpers outside the stadium didn't have anything in our price range :( I was a little bummed that we couldn't get tickets, but the night ended up being a blast anyways.

I feel like I'm in a different frame of mind living here in China. I am focused on taking advantage of the unique opportunities that I am presented with here (as diverse as they are). This might not sound like much of a revelation, but my whole approach is different than it was in New York. In NYC, I was constantly surrounded by a remarkable variety of exciting new things. I was able to partake in some cool activities, but I let a lot pass by... This isn't to say that I wasn't enjoying myself in NYC, but I was enjoying myself in the same way I've grown accustomed to without experimenting much. I spent most of my free time hanging out with friends in Brooklyn or playing frisbee. Good times for sure, but not different. In China, I find that I still spend a lot of time frisbee (frisbee is life, after all), but I approach new activities and excursions with a much more enthusiastic outlook. I'm going to Kanye West concerts, new restaurants, sweet mountains, international hockey matches, etc... Whenever a friend approaches me with a new idea, I have a little voice in the back of my head that says "you're only going to live here once - do it!" Hmmm, I just re-read that and its not terrible articulate, but I'm too tired to go back through and re-write it. Hope you're all able to decipher the babblings...

In other news, there is a definitive lack of good BBQ ribs in China. I'm contemplating building a smoker and filling this void. I'm sure many quality blog entries will result from this escapade...

Jon

NYT and MC Hammer - What do they have in common?

I was reading a NY Times article this morning that really struck me. Here is the intro:

"There is a new common symptom of the flu, in addition to the usual aches, coughs, fevers and sore throats. Turns out a lot of ailing Americans enter phrases like “flu symptoms” into Google and other search engines before they call their doctors.

That simple act, multiplied across millions of keyboards in homes around the country, has given rise to a new early warning system for fast-spreading flu outbreaks, called Google Flu Trends.

Tests of the new Web tool from Google.org, the company’s philanthropic unit, suggest that it may be able to detect regional outbreaks of the flu a week to 10 days before they are reported by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

We already know that Google is the best at everything (that's not my point here). Google is using the internet as a predictive tool. Instead of waiting for events to occur (and data to be collected and analyzed) here Google is getting predictive data immediately. This technique cuts out the labor (at time) intensive data collection process, thereby reaching conclusions much more quickly and, in this case, slowing the spread of a flu virus via quick dissemination of information. What a powerful tool! Statisticians would sell their collective souls to the devil just to get Google's search data...

In other news, a friend in Shanghai sent me the following YouTube video that made me laugh hysterically for at least a minute. You can learn a lot about China just by watching this video (note: my favorite part is the person in the background).



- Jon

"What I liked best was she had so much soul..."

Another exciting event from last week (Monday night) was the Kanye West concert!!!! It was really bizarre to see a concert in China. They whole thing seemed a little off, but it was still a hell of a lot of fun. The first act was hilarious and silly. Imagine an Asian version of Michael Jackson in a cut-off tanktop moonwalking back and forth across the stage throwing his hands up singing. Pretty spectacular. Kanye came out and the whole crowd went nuts. Now, it should be noted that the stadium was at less than 50% capacity and the crowd was composed overwhelmingly of white foreigners. It must have been a shock to Kanye to see a half-empty stadium of white people in Shanghai, but in China you have to be prepared for anything... The concert itself was a blast! Emma, Charlotte, and I were way up in the upper deck, but we had plenty of room and the girls broke up some dance moves. The sound system was powerful and crystal clear and we grooved. It was fun!!! Here are some pictures of us at the concert and then a couple of Kanye (that a friend in the front row took for us...)

Emma, me, and Char at the concert

Our view at the concert

Kanye doing his thing...

Every time we go back to Suzhou we take the train from Shanghai Railway station to Suzhou. Then we walk about 10 minutes to the bus stop (where we pick up the bus that takes us home). Anyways, so this past week as we were walking towards our bus stop we saw this guy reaching down into a hole in the storm drain on the side of the street. He was up to his elbow in the muck and he was really going after something. I assumed he had dropped something important in the drain and was trying to dig it out. Then, as we approached, he yanked out a fish! He was fishing with his bare hands in the sewer! He wrapped up his filthy fish (which was covered in muck) in a plastic bag and went on his way. God, I hope he doesn't work at a restaurant in our part of town...

Over and out from Suzhou.

- Jon
P.S. My new song obsessions are Hey Mama and Homecoming by Kanye...

In a minute...

Remember that PBS pre-commercial bizarre 15-second bit that went, “In a minute! In a minute! In a minute! In a minute!” ?? Letting us know that we only had to wait a (relative) minute before enjoying more Big Bird, or whatever…Anyone? Well, anyway, this post will be (should be) just as flashy: a sort of drive-by updating.

Hong Kong: Some of the weekend was pretty sweet. We all rocked out at the party, winning the prize for best group performance, and we also took in all the bright colors and drunken odors at the nearby carnival ala’ Mardi Gras. However, I was a little too ambitious: I played a bit of Ultimate and I paid the price. My back went out again, not even half way through the 2nd game. Turns out I’m not invincible. Blast! I was pretty pissed at myself for making the decision to play in the first place, and at not being able to play, and at being in stupidly horrid pain. Blah. I’m going to start seeing a Pilates/Physical Therapy expert in Shanghai, so initiative is (finally) being taken.

Halloween: Remember Halloween back in elementary school, dressing up as witches and vampires, trick-or-treating, and having a day of games and candy at school?? Awesome right? Well, when the table has turned, it becomes a royal pain of a freak show to provide the shenanigans that both kids want and teachers expect. It’s like each class is in competition to see how many stupid orange pumpkins she can hang up (which has completely killed our supply of orange paper, I’ll tell you that much). At first I was a little bitter, but I ended up getting into it. We played pin the hat on the witch, musical chairs, and mummy wrap. I even dressed up…I even made part of my costume (note the ears…and the hidden tail made of sewn cloth with a hanger and paper stuffed inside).

My cat-alicious self with some of my little munchkin wizards, witches, monkeys, skeletons, and fellow felines.

The basis for "Pin the Hat/Broom End/Feet on the Witch" that I drew. What a hideous monster I've created!

Mummy Wrap: The Pumpkin girl and the Scarecrow doing a scarily good job of mummifying their classmates.

I ended up having a great time, and came away with a sackful of candy. Bonus! Plus, later that evening we all went out (minus students…) to get free beer courtesy of our sweet costumes. Oh, the benefits of being a lao wai…

Election: HOLY MOLY!!! I am so f&*#ing glad that Obama won! I mean, this doesn’t instantly solve all of America’s or the world’s problems, but it’s surely a step in the right direction. I read an article from The Onion that my brother, Paul, brought to my attention, entitled Nation Finally Shitty Enough To Make Social Progress. It makes a pretty interesting, and painfully clear, point of how we can’t seem to get out of the habit of waiting until the shit really hits the fan and we’re all covered in the gross shit that we’ve, until now, tried to dump on the world…before even thinking of switching gears. Apparently, “42 percent of voters said that the nation's financial woes had finally become frightening enough to eclipse such concerns as gay marriage, while 30 percent said that the relentless body count in Iraq was at last harrowing enough to outweigh long ideological debates over abortion.” All I have to say is, puh-leez. Some Americans have - thankfully - momentarily pulled their heads out of their asses to make what in my mind was the right vote…I just hope now that the movement toward change doesn’t sacrifice “small” causes like gay marriage and women’s reproductive rights (the passing of Prop 8, banning gay marriage in California, already sends alarming shivers through my veins).

Furthermore, as Paul cautiously points out: Of course, even though Obama "kicked ass" in the election, and the "people have spoken," the vote was still something like a 52-48% split. This country is so weird. I’m with ya. America is freakin’ weird. Hopefully Obama can rally up the nation to help us really see and believe in the potential awesomeness that America has. I love ya, bro!

Over and out.
Em

P.S. Not quite drive-by in-a-minute updating…sorry…the intent was there. ☺

Black Market Receipts

Emma and I have spent a lot of time in Shanghai's Railway station over these past few months because of our many trips to and from Shanghai. On every corner surrounding the train station there are ladies mumbling under their breath "fa piao, fa piao, fa piao, fa piao" (fa piao means receipt in Chinese). So, I knew that these ladies were interested in receipts for some reason, but I didn't really understand why. I learned that they were interested in both buying and selling fa piao, but couldn't get any further because of my lack of speaking skills. I asked my friends in Shanghai about fa piao and found out that they are the official form of receipts and businesses use them for expenses and companies use them for tax purposes. These women in the railway station buy fa piao from anybody and sell them to people who need them for expenses.

Fa piao (note the red chops, Chinese people love that stuff)

This past weekend I was in the eyeglasses market with Milan and Mary (they were shopping) and we passed a fa piao lady. I got so excited that I scared my friends... I convinced Mary (who is fluent) to pump the fa piao lady for information. They had a little conversation that involved a lot of pointing at me, some laughing, and eventually some knowledge. It turns out that a fa piao for approximately 100 RMB is worth 2 RMB. So, for every receipt that I collect I can get 2% back on the black market! I'm going to collect all the fa piao I possibly can!!!! I'll be keeping track of the amount of $$$ I make from fa piao on the blog (although I haven't decided whether I should measure it in RMB or in fractions of Teppanyaki). All in all, this is a very exciting moment for me :)

- Jon

Shanghai Hockey?

This past weekend one of our friends scored some free tickets to an international hockey match (Shanghai Sharks vs. some team from South Korea). I'm not a big fan of hockey, but this sounded like a fun, new experience, so I was pretty excited about all of it! Anyways, after frisbee, some delicious Xinjiang food, and a quick trip to the eyeglasses market (I will say more about this in a later post) we made our way down to the stadium. The stadium was out on the end of the Line 9 subway. Now, I don't have a vast knowledge of Shanghai (I don't live there after all), but I hadn't even heard of Line 9. It is a rarely used boondocky subway that took us out into the 'burbs. It was like going back to Suzhou :) We got to the rink just in time for the game to begin and it was everything that I dreamed it would be... The hockey was definitely mediocre (think high school/college level), but the atmosphere was hilarious. There were thunder sticks everywhere, dancing cheerleaders on a stage (the Chinese seem to have an unhealthy obsession with cheerleaders, but that's a topic for another post), and beer-swilling Chinese hockey fans. It was terrific!

High quality hockey

Picture time at the hockey game!

The highlight of the match for me was betting Robin a bunch of bananas that no goals would be scored in the 3rd period only to have Shanghai tie up the score with a goal in the final 19 seconds of the 3rd period. You just can't manufacture excitement like that! Haha. Anyways, once the game was over we needed to get back to Shanghai, but at this point the subway is no longer so we hire out this sketchy mini-van and ride joyfully back to Shanghai. On the ride back, we prank called Joann (a frisbee friend). We pretended to be lost in cab with a cabbie who only spoke Cantonese and asked her to talk to the cabbie for us. Joann (who speaks Cantonese fluently) then spoke with the "cab driver" Geoff (our friend in the van who also speaks Cantonese). Geoff proceeded along an inappropriate line of questioning (in Cantonese) asking Joann if she was pretty and where she lived. It was all quite amusing at the time, but definitely loses something in the the re-telling. I actually just re-read that and realized how little sense it makes, but I'm too lazy to re-type all of that and I'm just going to leave it up there as is.

Ok, back to work for me!

- Jon

Halloween Suzhou-style

Halloween isn't really done here in China. The Chinese kids know about its existence and wanted to celebrate it. I taught them "trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat" and gave myself a virtual pat on the back. Now, that's a job well done. Haha. Aside from a couple of candy-crazed kids Halloween is a foreigner-only event in China. A bunch of the other young foreign teachers at our school decided that we should take advantage of the Friday night/Halloween festivities to go out in style. We found an Aussie bar in town that was serving free beer (7pm-midnight) to anybody in costume! I couldn't believe it. FREE BEER. This is unheard of... I mean, I'd dress up like an idiot every weekend if it meant free beer. God, I love free things. Anyways, we slapped together some costumes last minute. Actually, I shouldn't say that. The girls (Emma, Keli, and Amanda) put some serious time and effort (and arts & crafts skills) into their costume and turned out with 1 pregnant redneck and 2 cats. I decided to go with the low-effort route and chose to be a Chinese tour guide. Now, this doesn't make as much sense for those of you who have never seen a Chinese tour, but I'll try to give a little description. Basically, Chinese tours consist of 30 random Chinese (who are all forced to wear matching brightly colored hats) and a tour guide. The tour guide has a similiar brightly colored hat, brightly colored flag, and finals a mobile amp for blasting whatever it is they say to anybody within a 5-mile radius. Anyways, we made our way downtown as a Chinese tour guide, 2 cats, and a pregnant redneck (and her husband) . We drank free beer, chatted, and had a wonderful time. The best part of it was actually the whole crowd of Chinese that gathered around the bar to stare at all the foreigners in costume. They enjoyed the show as much as we enjoyed the free beer. It was a win-win!

Quality Halloween in China!

- Jon
P.S. MUCH more will follow in the near future. Sorry I haven't been updating recently, but I'll get back on that...